Retrospection (III)

This is for all the 80's babies out there. I recently saw a trailer on Kids' Central about the retro kids' shows that they're bringing back.

Some people would consider it childhood blasphemy to not at least make a mention of Ses*me Street. But can I just say that I don't like it? The puppets are raggy and worn and maybe I discovered it too late, but what's so fun about learning and relearning numbers 1-10 with the Count Whatever who punctuates every number with a peal of fake thunder and Ho Ho Ho?

And the pair of eggheads with ambiguous orientation, the quarrlesome Bernie and Ernie? They're always arguing over nothing, which really got on my nerves.

But let's move on, and talk about my favs!

C*re Be*rs
C*re Be*r stare! Remember these candy-floss coloured bears with different symbols on their tummies to show their different super powers? They live among the clouds and spy on unhappy little children using a telescope (ewww....). I remember my parents buying me the bedtime bear when I was young.

Anyway, they have a silly quiz to let you know which bear you should be. And guess what am I?

Bedtime Bear stays up nights. He's the special bear who helps people get a good night's sleep and makes sure that they have sweet dreams. There's no better bear buddy for a goodnight hug. Bedtime has a symbol that says what he's all about: a sleepy-faced moon.
Caring Mission: Helps people sleep.
Symbol: His crescent moon symbol represents his nighttime mission. Personality: Brave and alert (at night).
Character Quirk: During the day, he's always confused or dozing off.
Color: Blue.
Motto:Sleep is what I do best!

Source: www.care-bears.com

My Little P*ny
I was quite a fan of these pastel-coloured ponies which come with thick, luscious wavy manes just inviting to be stroked and different emblems on their bums (hmm, I'm beginning to see a trend here). They live in a place called Dream Valley, under the thumb (hoof) of a queen pony and erm, basically fly around. OK, so they're not very interesting. I checked on the Internet and there are different generations of ponies, some with wings and some without and some have powers and some don't, but really, who cares? Next!

Button Moon
"We're off to Button Moon,
to follow Mr. Spoon"

There's something fishy about this show. How else to explain its hypnotic effect on so many little kids who watched it, despite its kooky plot? Friends who've watched it all remember it well, but I bet no one can give a reason why.

It's about a family of spoons who rides a tin can rocket up the sky for a rendezvous with a host of "household implements" (trash can, broom, buckets, you get the picture.) whose sole role is to clean and polish a yellow button masquerading as the moon.

Makes no sense to me, even now. Help!

Str*wberry Shortc*ke
The fav of many little girls, though it's hard to explain why. A strawberry-coloured-haired girl with no apparent personality or aptitude and who surrounds herself with equally dreary creatures with such names as Blueberry Muffin and Butter Cookie. They all live in some unimaginatively named Strawberry Land and wear dumpy hats shaped like dollops of cream or the clothed top of jam jars.

Why did we like them? How do I know? Some of these cartoons are really inane with no educational value but I realise that they were really quite effective propaganda for toy products (but not Button Moon; they don't sell toy merchandise), making us little tykes pester parents for toy ponies and figurines, believing them to be our friends because they're always shown helping out small children in trouble in cartoons.

And I remember they even had those sticker albums and each week you have to buy a packet of stickers to collect all of them. Very pointless, but kids are easily satisfied. I wish they wouldn't prey on little kids like that. I think our generation, brought up to believe that friendship and joy come packaged in a box with a cuddly bear to be picked up at the nearest departmental store, carries that attitude through to adult life. No wonder when we're upset, one of the first impulses is to shop.